Sex and continence

To reduce the risk of leaking during intercourse empty your bladder and bowel before you begin and limit your intake of things that make you wee, such as caffeine and alcohol. If you use clean intermittent catheterisation, do so before sex – this may interfere with the spontaneity of the moment but does reduce the risk of leaking. Sex that’s planned and prepared for can be just as exciting as spontaneous sex and anticipation is a turn-on for a lot of people. 

Leakage might happen but don’t worry - sex is actually a fairly messy business anyway. Be prepared: keep a supply of wet wipes and some towels handy and remember communication and a sense of humour go a long way. You could consider a waterproof mattress protector, there are some quieter ones available that don’t make crinkling sounds when you move around. 

You may worry about losing control of your bladder or bowel during sex but the best thing you can do to reduce your anxiety is to talk frankly to your partner. And remember, we all have bodily functions, there’s nothing you need feel squeamish or shy about. 

If you have an indwelling catheter, you can still have penetrative sex. 

If you are male and using a condom it can go over the catheter. Make sure you empty your bag first and use a spigot or bung in the end of the tube where the bag is usually attached. 

If you are female, again empty the bag and place a spigot or bung where the bag usually goes. Then tape or strap the catheter to the inside of your thigh – this will keep it out of the way. If you can catheterise yourself, just remove the catheter and replace it with a new one when you have finished. 

For women: Pay careful attention to your hygiene when you’re on your period and after sex to reduce the risk of urinary tract infections.